Male privilege

I think we need to talk about male privilege as a trans femme person. This is not an easy topic for most amab (assigned male at birth) people.

I came out at 55. This means that I might have struggled with my identity for so long. It might mean that I didn't use my male privilege consciously (I didn't!) or that I even was aware of it. But I had it. It worked in my favor, even if I didn't know.

No one tried to mansplain (men unsolicitedly explaining things to women) things to me. Or manpeated (a man repeating exactly what a women previously said and getting the credit for it) whatever I said. Or doubted something I said ("Are you sure about that?").

In fact I always wondered why people had so much respect for what I said. I never was an alpha male or behaved dominant in any way. And yet, when there was a discussion and I said "Let's do this. It will work this way." I rarely got critical questions or even open opposition. 

OK, so where does that leave me?

1. I have to acknowledge that I had this privilege. That I got through school and university mostly unchallenged.
2. I have the obligation to make space for women and other underrepresented groups (yes, that's what women are in tech!) so their voice is heard and their ideas are acknowledged.
3. I don't need to "give them a voice". They have one! Just shut up to let them be heard.
4. Listen to them and believe them when they say that there is a problem.
5. It might be that I don't care about my (academic) title. So I can leave it out whenever I feel like it. But this does not mean that other people think the same. I have no idea what it cost them or their family to get this degree and it's none of my business to talk this down, just because I had a comparatively easy youth or education. I know shit about them.

So maybe I'm not the only one who should think about this.